2017 gave me a friend…


10:00 am in the morning. It’s a weekend. A weekend like any other. A day of rest, a chance to sleep in, an opportunity to switch off your phone and ignore the world as you treat yourself to long baths, soaked feet, scalp massages and a special meal. A meal you’d have to fill all your bowls with spices and will cook for just a little longer than usual, just to give it that special taste, or simply because you’re extra.

All the while, you’ll be watching Shark Tank, because it’s a day to binge watch, but you still want to learn, you have an interest in Entrepreneurship anyway. Or Project Runway, because competition gives you thrill and you are reminded of your creative self. Or listen to a 3 hour long jazz music compilation as you do yoga, because you’ve learned the value of meditation, and you resonate with mature, seasoned music, as is your opinion.

Or you’ll simply be lying on your bed. Sipping on your green tea as you reflect on life. Jazz music in the background, of course. Or acoustic, for a change. You’ll be reflecting on the experiences of the year, the good and bad. The painful season you went through mid year stands out the most.

God’s Sovereignty and Providence.

You read through your 2016 journey from your journal. You are old school like that, journals and all. But you love documenting, so you don’t forget. You see how much you’ve grown through your insecurities and failures. Painful to remember, but most appreciated.

You begin drafting your 2017 achievements and lessons. You also write down your 2018 goals. It’s still November, but who cares. You are an early planner. As you pen them down, your phone vibrates.

WhatsApp message.

F: Gertie
Me: Hey, what’s up? 🙂 
Because smileys make the message.
F: Why are you ignoring my message. You know I have few friends!! *laughs*
Me: Haha, I am not. *Sends heart emoji* I am writing down my 2018 goals.

That’s what growing up does to you. With age, you sieve out most friendships. You realize who adds value.

F: Already? Let me see.
Me: *Sends screenshots*

We all know a person who got in trouble over screenshots 🙂

F: You’ll be turning 27 years next year. Grown woman with no time to waste.


Growing up is a trap, they tell you. Only if you let it.

27 years, that will be your age next year. And as usual, you know what to expect. Wedding committees. Baby showers. Bridal showers and Engagement parties. you have come of age, as society has decided. Age of  “Are you seeing someone?”

You will simply jump and pass, as your Nigerian sister has taught you to say.

Coincidentally, as you write this paragraph, your former salonist will call you with the good news that she has delivered a baby and wants you to visit 🙂

You can already tell the tone 2018 will take.

Me: It’s good to plan early 🙂 How’s work?
F: It’s great. Recently, I was seated in a meeting with a room full of 20 men. It was so uncomfortable 🙁 My mentor told me I should work twice as hard, so I don’t come off as incompetent.

You can relate to that. It’s something you became aware of since two years ago when you became a Software Engineer. You recall a couple of nights you cried yourself to sleep out of feeling you are not qualified enough and contemplated quitting. You look back and feel glad that your confidence grew, but you know you still have to fight that battle again, considering you are looking to transition to a leadership/managerial role. A whole different ball game. But you know. This time you know how to fight it.

It’s not who you are that holds you back. It’s who you think you’re not

Me: Yeah, I know the feeling. Just don’t let it get to you. You’re qualified, stick with that 🙂
F: 🙂 🙂
Me: We should do a girls trip soon.
F: Yes, we need to go snorkeling.
Me: We also did not celebrate our birthdays this year. We still have to get that cake!
F: *laughs*

And that’s when you write it down under your achievements:

2017 gave me a friend, who became a sister.


Eye for Ebony

2 Comment

  1. Catherine chepkurui says: Reply

    Relatable 😉

  2. Sonie says: Reply

    Nice read….i love it

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